1
00:00:13,914 --> 00:00:15,884
and so we welcome you,
2
00:00:15,917 --> 00:00:19,222
no matter what part of
the galaxy you're from,
3
00:00:19,255 --> 00:00:24,195
to the 10th annual north
American ufo convention,
4
00:00:32,807 --> 00:00:35,545
I believe,
5
00:00:39,550 --> 00:00:41,219
Oh, please!
6
00:00:41,252 --> 00:00:43,031
"The aliens did this to me,
The aliens did that to me,"
7
00:00:43,055 --> 00:00:44,958
You keep telling the
same stupid story
8
00:00:44,991 --> 00:00:46,494
year after year,
9
00:00:46,527 --> 00:00:48,106
When the hell are you
going to get over it?
10
00:00:48,130 --> 00:00:50,098
Around the same time
you stop dressing up
11
00:00:50,132 --> 00:00:52,235
like a Jolly green
Giant sex toy,
12
00:00:52,269 --> 00:00:54,539
At least I've had
a close encounter,
13
00:00:54,572 --> 00:00:56,809
I think you liked
having that probe up...
14
00:00:56,842 --> 00:00:59,011
I told you,
they didn't probe me,
15
00:00:59,045 --> 00:01:01,115
I stopped them,
16
00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:03,385
Oh, that's what you'd
like us to believe,
17
00:01:03,418 --> 00:01:05,320
No, no, no!
18
00:01:05,354 --> 00:01:07,490
The meconia were very
clear on that point,
19
00:01:07,524 --> 00:01:09,426
Did you not read my last book?
20
00:01:09,460 --> 00:01:10,461
No, Did you read mine?
21
00:01:10,494 --> 00:01:13,165
I couldn't even find it,
22
00:01:13,198 --> 00:01:14,767
Carl sagan was meconian,
23
00:01:14,801 --> 00:01:16,436
Sagan was a pod person,
24
00:01:16,470 --> 00:01:18,038
I've got the
evidence right here,
25
00:01:18,072 --> 00:01:20,208
The only thing in
there is your lunch,
26
00:01:20,241 --> 00:01:22,578
It's not the Alien finger,
27
00:01:22,612 --> 00:01:25,015
I'm not going to carry it around
28
00:01:25,048 --> 00:01:26,884
everywhere I go,
29
00:01:26,917 --> 00:01:28,987
But you promised me,
Gunther, when we, you know,,,
30
00:01:29,021 --> 00:01:30,990
that I was going to
experience the finger,
31
00:01:31,023 --> 00:01:32,826
You will, You will,
32
00:01:32,859 --> 00:01:34,094
I want it now!
33
00:01:34,128 --> 00:01:35,096
I want the finger,
34
00:01:35,129 --> 00:01:36,274
I don't want a rotten carrot,
35
00:01:36,298 --> 00:01:37,599
It's not a carrot!
36
00:01:37,633 --> 00:01:39,569
You lied to me, Gunther,
37
00:01:39,603 --> 00:01:41,571
You lied,,,
38
00:01:50,651 --> 00:01:53,022
for Pete's sake,
boo, what kept you?
39
00:01:53,055 --> 00:01:54,957
This printer screwed
up our press release,
40
00:01:54,991 --> 00:01:57,227
No, no, no, no,
I took care of it,
41
00:01:57,260 --> 00:01:58,730
It's fine,
42
00:01:58,763 --> 00:01:59,998
As usual,
43
00:02:00,032 --> 00:02:02,368
it sounds like world
War iii in here,
44
00:02:02,401 --> 00:02:03,570
Everybody,
45
00:02:03,603 --> 00:02:05,172
can I have your
attention, please?
46
00:02:05,206 --> 00:02:07,976
Everybody, listen up,
47
00:02:08,009 --> 00:02:09,345
Damn it, I said listen!
48
00:02:11,681 --> 00:02:13,050
Well, um,,,
49
00:02:13,083 --> 00:02:15,120
I hope everyone
enjoyed their fondue,
50
00:02:15,153 --> 00:02:18,691
Like I always say,
it's food you can trust,
51
00:02:20,093 --> 00:02:23,398
Well, before we get on
with tonight's business,
52
00:02:23,431 --> 00:02:26,035
I have a personal
statement I'd like to make,
53
00:02:26,069 --> 00:02:28,305
I couldn't help noticing
that certain of you
54
00:02:28,339 --> 00:02:30,642
have chosen to
disregard my request
55
00:02:30,675 --> 00:02:32,220
that tonight's planning
committee soiree
56
00:02:32,244 --> 00:02:34,314
remain apolitical,
57
00:02:34,347 --> 00:02:35,983
I sound like a broken record,
58
00:02:36,016 --> 00:02:39,321
but this constant bickering,
it's,,,it's insufferable,
59
00:02:39,354 --> 00:02:41,190
There is no way the
rest of the world
60
00:02:41,223 --> 00:02:43,360
will ever take us seriously
61
00:02:43,393 --> 00:02:45,362
and respect us
62
00:02:45,396 --> 00:02:47,799
if we do not respect ourselves,
63
00:02:47,833 --> 00:02:49,735
Now, when the convention
starts tomorrow
64
00:02:49,769 --> 00:02:51,271
and the press arrives,
65
00:02:51,304 --> 00:02:53,541
I want us to be
civil to each other,
66
00:02:53,574 --> 00:02:57,046
The moment one of us breaks Rank
and starts bashing the others,
67
00:02:57,079 --> 00:02:58,314
the press will jump right in,
68
00:02:58,348 --> 00:03:00,651
and they'll make
us all look like
69
00:03:00,684 --> 00:03:03,222
a bunch of silly,
disorganized lunatics,
70
00:03:03,255 --> 00:03:05,725
Which is why Ike asked me...
71
00:03:05,758 --> 00:03:06,960
Hi, everybody...
72
00:03:06,993 --> 00:03:08,997
To come up with a theme
73
00:03:09,030 --> 00:03:11,099
that sort of captures the
zeitgeist of our message,
74
00:03:11,133 --> 00:03:13,103
Don't you roll your eyes at
me, Gunther Van Owen,
75
00:03:13,136 --> 00:03:15,172
You're one of the first
the tv crews'll head for,
76
00:03:15,205 --> 00:03:17,108
Damn right...
77
00:03:17,141 --> 00:03:19,444
Me and the rest of
the Fifth Column,
78
00:03:19,477 --> 00:03:20,646
Bunch of thugs,
79
00:03:20,679 --> 00:03:23,618
We've got something to show,,,
80
00:03:24,752 --> 00:03:26,454
something big,
81
00:03:26,487 --> 00:03:27,890
Oh, you mean
82
00:03:27,923 --> 00:03:29,292
that piece of rotten carrot
83
00:03:29,325 --> 00:03:30,694
you've been carrying around?
84
00:03:30,727 --> 00:03:32,229
It is not a carrot,
85
00:03:33,164 --> 00:03:35,234
Whatever it is, it's disgusting,
86
00:03:35,267 --> 00:03:36,502
and it has nothing to do
87
00:03:36,535 --> 00:03:37,904
with reality,
88
00:03:37,938 --> 00:03:40,507
Our extra-Terrestrial friends
89
00:03:40,541 --> 00:03:41,943
are beautiful,
diaphanous creatures,
90
00:03:41,976 --> 00:03:43,679
not toads like you,
91
00:03:43,713 --> 00:03:44,981
Diaphanous?
92
00:03:45,014 --> 00:03:47,084
The creature that impregnated me
93
00:03:47,117 --> 00:03:48,219
was definitely reptilian,
94
00:03:48,252 --> 00:03:49,655
You say that
95
00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:51,099
about all creatures
that impregnate you,
96
00:03:51,123 --> 00:03:52,325
Yeah?
97
00:03:52,358 --> 00:03:53,960
Come over here and say that,
98
00:03:53,994 --> 00:03:55,329
Come on,
99
00:03:58,667 --> 00:03:59,835
Stop!
100
00:03:59,869 --> 00:04:01,471
Back off, everybody,
101
00:04:02,773 --> 00:04:05,476
You people are incorrigible,
102
00:04:05,510 --> 00:04:06,845
One of reasons I
joined this group
103
00:04:06,879 --> 00:04:09,149
was because of the
fellowship it provided,
104
00:04:09,182 --> 00:04:12,286
We know that we
are not alone here
105
00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:13,755
on starship earth,
106
00:04:13,788 --> 00:04:15,291
and whether you look at aliens
107
00:04:15,324 --> 00:04:18,695
as a malignant fungus or
e, T, In a tutu,
108
00:04:18,728 --> 00:04:21,533
we need to stand
together and say,
109
00:04:21,566 --> 00:04:24,270
in one united Voice,
110
00:04:24,303 --> 00:04:26,373
two very simple words,,,
111
00:04:28,042 --> 00:04:29,712
"I believe,"
112
00:04:32,148 --> 00:04:34,785
We hunger for a sign
113
00:04:34,818 --> 00:04:37,856
that our faith is
the right faith,
114
00:04:37,889 --> 00:04:39,525
and, for me,
115
00:04:39,558 --> 00:04:43,264
these two words are a statement
that we have seen things,
116
00:04:43,297 --> 00:04:46,168
and that the truth has
been revealed to us,
117
00:04:46,201 --> 00:04:48,404
"I believe?"
118
00:04:48,438 --> 00:04:49,773
I believe that slogan sucks,
119
00:04:49,807 --> 00:04:51,242
That's what I believe,
120
00:04:51,275 --> 00:04:52,677
Yeah, me too,
121
00:04:52,711 --> 00:04:54,580
It would have been
way better in silver,
122
00:04:54,613 --> 00:04:57,384
What is wrong with all of you?
123
00:04:57,418 --> 00:04:59,487
Don't you want to
be taken seriously
124
00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:01,991
for once in your lives?
125
00:05:02,024 --> 00:05:03,526
If you want to be
taken seriously,
126
00:05:03,559 --> 00:05:04,994
you'll need more than a t-Shirt,
127
00:05:07,231 --> 00:05:10,269
You're going to need
what I have in this box,
128
00:05:10,302 --> 00:05:11,604
I'm sorry, sir,
129
00:05:11,638 --> 00:05:14,307
but this is a
convention-Planning meeting,
130
00:05:14,342 --> 00:05:15,910
If you have something to sell,
131
00:05:15,943 --> 00:05:18,847
there'll be a consignment
table set up on Sunday,
132
00:05:18,881 --> 00:05:20,584
Do I look like I'm
selling something?
133
00:05:20,617 --> 00:05:23,421
I've been driving in circles
in the desert for three days
134
00:05:23,454 --> 00:05:25,423
trying to figure out
what to do with this,
135
00:05:25,457 --> 00:05:26,792
What is it?
136
00:05:28,461 --> 00:05:30,658
The stuff your
dreams are made of,
137
00:05:56,227 --> 00:05:58,614
there is nothing wrong
with your television,
138
00:05:58,646 --> 00:06:01,480
Do not attempt To
adjust the picture,
139
00:06:01,512 --> 00:06:04,378
We are now controlling
the transmission,
140
00:06:04,409 --> 00:06:05,970
We control the horizontal,,,
141
00:06:06,001 --> 00:06:07,752
and the vertical,
142
00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:11,255
We can delude you with
a thousand channels
143
00:06:11,286 --> 00:06:15,903
or expand one single image
to crystal clarity,,,
144
00:06:15,935 --> 00:06:17,782
and beyond,
145
00:06:17,814 --> 00:06:19,629
We can shape your vision
146
00:06:19,661 --> 00:06:23,354
to anything our
imagination can conceive,
147
00:06:25,073 --> 00:06:26,634
For the next hour,
148
00:06:26,665 --> 00:06:30,519
we will control all
that you see and hear,
149
00:06:37,205 --> 00:06:41,153
You are about to experience
the awe and mystery
150
00:06:41,185 --> 00:06:43,668
which reaches from
the deepest inner mind
151
00:06:43,700 --> 00:06:46,693
to The outer limits,
152
00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:55,173
In an age of doubt,
153
00:06:55,207 --> 00:06:59,860
there is nothing more powerful
than the need to seek answers,
154
00:06:59,894 --> 00:07:04,814
but what happens when
the cloak is lifted
155
00:07:04,846 --> 00:07:06,242
and those answers
suddenly revealed?
156
00:07:06,276 --> 00:07:09,801
I hope I haven't made a
mistake showing this to you,
157
00:07:09,833 --> 00:07:11,030
Is it real?
158
00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:13,523
What kind of starcruiser
did it come from?
159
00:07:13,557 --> 00:07:15,684
Show it to us again,
160
00:07:15,717 --> 00:07:18,708
As head of convention security,
I say we 86 this guy right now,
161
00:07:18,743 --> 00:07:20,172
We're not going to 86 anyone,
162
00:07:20,204 --> 00:07:22,167
We don't know anything
about this guy
163
00:07:22,199 --> 00:07:23,464
or that,,,thing,
164
00:07:23,496 --> 00:07:25,923
They could both be radioactive,
165
00:07:25,956 --> 00:07:27,618
For all we know,
166
00:07:27,652 --> 00:07:29,805
that thing could make us glow
Like bonzerian zot-Worms,
167
00:07:32,007 --> 00:07:33,636
I assure you,
168
00:07:33,668 --> 00:07:36,061
the fragment is harmless,
169
00:07:36,095 --> 00:07:37,891
Tell that to the cancerous lump
170
00:07:37,924 --> 00:07:40,749
growing on my spine, rummy,
171
00:07:40,783 --> 00:07:41,746
I'm going to ask you and the box
172
00:07:41,781 --> 00:07:42,976
to leave Nicely,
173
00:07:43,010 --> 00:07:46,168
I ask again,
we're going to tussle,
174
00:07:46,202 --> 00:07:48,163
Please, just listen to me,
175
00:07:48,196 --> 00:07:50,423
For 22 years,
I was a civilian accountant
176
00:07:50,457 --> 00:07:51,487
at nellis Air force base,
177
00:07:51,519 --> 00:07:53,713
That's area 51,
178
00:07:53,747 --> 00:07:55,343
Check the noncom work records
179
00:07:55,376 --> 00:07:56,805
if you don't believe me,
180
00:07:56,839 --> 00:07:58,567
You'll find my name there,
181
00:07:58,599 --> 00:08:00,263
Max Buford?
182
00:08:00,296 --> 00:08:01,326
Buford,
183
00:08:02,589 --> 00:08:05,349
Two weeks ago,
I was assigned to audit
184
00:08:05,381 --> 00:08:07,809
the construction of an
underground storage facility,
185
00:08:07,842 --> 00:08:09,305
I found a discrepancy,
186
00:08:09,338 --> 00:08:10,901
When I went to inquire about it,
187
00:08:10,934 --> 00:08:12,462
I saw this strange craft
188
00:08:12,496 --> 00:08:15,754
being disassembled by
military personnel,
189
00:08:15,788 --> 00:08:18,014
Pieces of the ship were
being placed into boxes
190
00:08:18,047 --> 00:08:20,508
in preparation for being
hauled away on trains,
191
00:08:20,540 --> 00:08:22,802
I was told to forget
everything I had seen,
192
00:08:22,834 --> 00:08:25,561
and though I tried to ignore
it and simply do my job,
193
00:08:25,593 --> 00:08:27,621
I found I could not,
194
00:08:27,655 --> 00:08:29,850
Betraying the trust
that was placed in me,
195
00:08:29,883 --> 00:08:31,744
I stole one of
the smaller boxes,
196
00:08:31,777 --> 00:08:34,470
put it into the trunk of my
car, and drove away,
197
00:08:34,502 --> 00:08:36,663
That box is before you now,
198
00:08:36,696 --> 00:08:38,858
Wow,
199
00:08:38,890 --> 00:08:41,451
That is an amazing
story, Mr, Buford,
200
00:08:41,483 --> 00:08:42,914
It's the truth,
201
00:08:42,947 --> 00:08:45,540
Our government is conspiring
with the creatures
202
00:08:45,572 --> 00:08:46,603
that built that craft,
203
00:08:46,636 --> 00:08:49,895
The world needs to know,
204
00:08:49,928 --> 00:08:51,033
The government
know it's missing?
205
00:08:51,057 --> 00:08:52,920
Probably, In which case...
206
00:08:52,952 --> 00:08:54,448
They'll kill you,
207
00:08:54,482 --> 00:08:55,644
Dead,
208
00:08:55,679 --> 00:08:57,573
Hell,
I knew a guy who knew a guy,
209
00:08:57,607 --> 00:08:59,435
That guy crossed the
feds just like you did,
210
00:08:59,469 --> 00:09:00,930
10 years later,
211
00:09:00,965 --> 00:09:02,570
he's eating at the Jolly
troll smorgasbord...
212
00:09:02,593 --> 00:09:03,857
In Billings?
213
00:09:03,890 --> 00:09:05,286
That's the one, Bang!
214
00:09:05,318 --> 00:09:07,612
He goes face Down
into his tater tots,
215
00:09:07,646 --> 00:09:09,873
Turns out a motherhumping
heart attack
216
00:09:09,906 --> 00:09:11,501
Just rocked his world,
217
00:09:11,535 --> 00:09:13,264
Coincidence? I think not,
218
00:09:14,627 --> 00:09:16,288
Why would you tell
a story like that?
219
00:09:18,550 --> 00:09:20,644
I think it's truly courageous
of you to come here,
220
00:09:20,677 --> 00:09:22,506
and I think I can
speak for all of us
221
00:09:22,539 --> 00:09:24,476
when I say thank you from
the bottom of our hearts,
222
00:09:24,500 --> 00:09:26,029
Well, I ain't thanking him,
223
00:09:26,061 --> 00:09:28,156
His story's a load of crap,
224
00:09:28,190 --> 00:09:30,817
That fragment didn't
come from area 51,
225
00:09:30,849 --> 00:09:32,379
There are no train tracks
226
00:09:32,412 --> 00:09:33,875
going into that base,
227
00:09:33,908 --> 00:09:35,670
Apparently, the hair goo
228
00:09:35,703 --> 00:09:36,800
has infected your brain,
229
00:09:36,832 --> 00:09:37,997
He's referring to
230
00:09:38,029 --> 00:09:39,924
their cold-Fusion
underground rail system,
231
00:09:39,958 --> 00:09:42,684
Shut-up,
There is no underground system,
232
00:09:42,716 --> 00:09:45,044
The damned photos
are on the internet,
233
00:09:45,078 --> 00:09:47,171
What if aliens sent him?
234
00:09:48,534 --> 00:09:50,928
The meconia have
always been willing
235
00:09:50,961 --> 00:09:52,589
to share their
technology with us,
236
00:09:52,623 --> 00:09:54,718
The meconia have got
nothing to do with this,
237
00:09:54,751 --> 00:09:56,778
This kind of technology,,,
238
00:09:58,972 --> 00:10:01,465
it's vortid all the way,
239
00:10:01,500 --> 00:10:03,295
What if the fragment
isn't stolen?
240
00:10:03,328 --> 00:10:06,053
What if the government
sent him here
241
00:10:06,087 --> 00:10:08,246
as part of some
disinformation campaign?
242
00:10:08,281 --> 00:10:09,942
Anyone think of that?
243
00:10:09,977 --> 00:10:12,768
Well, if the fragment is real,
where's the disinformation?
244
00:10:12,802 --> 00:10:16,691
Maybe they just want
us to think it's real,
245
00:10:16,723 --> 00:10:18,918
Or the aliens wanted
us to see the fragment
246
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:20,946
because they need to
tell us something,
247
00:10:20,979 --> 00:10:23,174
Yeah! Like,
maybe it's a distress signal
248
00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:25,568
from their base station
on the ocean floor,
249
00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:28,126
You're all missing the point,
250
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,052
Think of all the
grainy photographs
251
00:10:31,084 --> 00:10:32,448
and half-Baked stories
252
00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:34,475
we've hitched our wagons
to over the years,
253
00:10:34,510 --> 00:10:37,136
trying to grab onto
something that proved
254
00:10:37,168 --> 00:10:39,461
our belief in Aliens
was justified,
255
00:10:39,495 --> 00:10:41,690
We have it now,
256
00:10:41,723 --> 00:10:43,650
This fragment,
it's our holy grail,
257
00:10:43,684 --> 00:10:45,645
Is that what you believe,
258
00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:49,202
you, with your hoity-Toity
college education?
259
00:10:49,235 --> 00:10:50,765
It's what I believe, too,
260
00:10:50,798 --> 00:10:52,194
Ike pilchard,
261
00:10:52,226 --> 00:10:53,890
transit system coordinator,
262
00:10:53,923 --> 00:10:54,887
And me,
263
00:10:54,919 --> 00:10:56,583
Tyler buttram,
264
00:10:56,615 --> 00:10:58,677
with my advanced degrees
in portuguese literature,
265
00:10:58,709 --> 00:10:59,906
animal husbandry,,,
266
00:10:59,940 --> 00:11:01,701
ditto,
except for the degrees part...
267
00:11:01,735 --> 00:11:03,696
Although I am certified
to work as an x-Ray tech,
268
00:11:03,730 --> 00:11:05,525
Mr, Buford,
269
00:11:05,558 --> 00:11:07,396
we've already set up a press
conference for tomorrow,
270
00:11:07,420 --> 00:11:08,881
and with your permission,
271
00:11:08,915 --> 00:11:10,544
I'd like to reveal the fragment
272
00:11:10,576 --> 00:11:12,771
to the world,
273
00:11:12,805 --> 00:11:15,065
Are you high on the crack?
274
00:11:15,099 --> 00:11:16,959
The feds'll be on him
like maggots on Roadkill,
275
00:11:16,994 --> 00:11:18,589
Look,
276
00:11:18,622 --> 00:11:20,784
you're a relative Newcomer
to these conventions, boo,
277
00:11:20,817 --> 00:11:22,280
Trust me,
278
00:11:22,313 --> 00:11:24,315
there's a lot of things that
you just don't know about,
279
00:11:24,339 --> 00:11:26,269
Well, there's one
thing that I do know,
280
00:11:26,302 --> 00:11:27,540
With Mr, Buford and the fragment
281
00:11:27,564 --> 00:11:28,861
out in the open,
282
00:11:28,894 --> 00:11:31,554
the government would be
stupid to do anything,
283
00:11:31,587 --> 00:11:33,283
Even you can see that, Dale,
284
00:11:33,315 --> 00:11:35,808
Boo is absolutely
right, Mr, Buford,
285
00:11:35,842 --> 00:11:37,371
Really,
286
00:11:37,403 --> 00:11:39,498
it's the only way
to save yourself,
287
00:11:41,492 --> 00:11:43,463
I just want you to know I
appreciate what you're doing,
288
00:11:43,487 --> 00:11:45,017
Well, Mr, Buford, I assure you
289
00:11:45,051 --> 00:11:47,311
the feeling is mutual,
290
00:11:47,344 --> 00:11:48,940
I know that some of us
291
00:11:48,972 --> 00:11:50,867
may seem a little extreme,
292
00:11:50,901 --> 00:11:53,129
but, for the most part,
we're good people,
293
00:11:53,161 --> 00:11:54,791
Can I tell you something?
294
00:11:54,824 --> 00:11:56,486
Tonight,
you have renewed my faith
295
00:11:56,519 --> 00:11:58,082
that aliens exist here on earth,
296
00:11:58,115 --> 00:11:59,942
and for that,
I'm really grateful,
297
00:11:59,976 --> 00:12:01,506
This is your room,
298
00:12:01,538 --> 00:12:03,899
Page me if you need anything
and I'll be here in a flash,
299
00:12:03,931 --> 00:12:05,561
You're safe with us,
300
00:12:05,594 --> 00:12:06,891
I've got one man
301
00:12:06,923 --> 00:12:08,853
eyeballing your
car from the roof,
302
00:12:08,886 --> 00:12:10,713
another will be outside
this door all night,
303
00:12:10,747 --> 00:12:12,675
Really?
304
00:12:12,707 --> 00:12:14,371
You think that's necessary?
305
00:12:14,403 --> 00:12:17,230
A little information
can get a guy killed,
306
00:12:17,263 --> 00:12:18,859
Enough said,
307
00:12:18,891 --> 00:12:21,352
I think a Little information
can be uplifting,
308
00:12:21,384 --> 00:12:23,413
Now, remember what I said,
if you need anything,,,
309
00:12:23,446 --> 00:12:25,373
Yeah,
310
00:12:27,866 --> 00:12:29,496
Are you trying to be ignorant
311
00:12:29,529 --> 00:12:31,158
when you say things like that?
312
00:12:31,192 --> 00:12:32,654
What? What'd I say?
313
00:12:32,688 --> 00:12:34,715
You said there'd be
men watching him,
314
00:12:34,747 --> 00:12:36,676
Correct me if I'm wrong,
315
00:12:36,709 --> 00:12:38,737
but you're our only
security, right?
316
00:12:38,771 --> 00:12:40,798
Do you think he'll feel safer
317
00:12:40,830 --> 00:12:43,025
knowing the entire FBI
is out to Ruby Ridge him
318
00:12:43,059 --> 00:12:45,186
and I'm the only thing
standing in the way?
319
00:12:45,218 --> 00:12:46,849
The FBI doesn't
know where he is,
320
00:12:46,882 --> 00:12:49,508
Wake up and smell the
cheese, honey,
321
00:12:49,542 --> 00:12:51,302
The walls have eyes,
322
00:12:51,337 --> 00:12:54,229
Any one of the people
in that room tonight
323
00:12:54,262 --> 00:12:56,688
could be FBI in
Deep-Cover assignment,
324
00:12:56,722 --> 00:12:59,648
Oh, sure, you're saying Dale's
all buggy and paranoid,,,
325
00:13:03,604 --> 00:13:05,731
but I've made inquiries
into certain people,
326
00:13:05,763 --> 00:13:07,757
and it wouldn't surprise
me one little bit
327
00:13:07,791 --> 00:13:09,288
that it comes back
328
00:13:09,321 --> 00:13:11,447
that they're not who
they say they are,
329
00:13:11,482 --> 00:13:13,909
And who exactly are
you referring to?
330
00:13:13,941 --> 00:13:16,534
Well, when I get the facts,
you'll be the first to know,
331
00:13:16,568 --> 00:13:18,263
but only because I like you,
332
00:13:52,968 --> 00:13:56,559
Now, some ignorant Types
May think my kind of a job
333
00:13:56,592 --> 00:13:58,654
is a nowhere road
to dead endsville,
334
00:13:58,687 --> 00:14:03,075
but to me, parking-Lot security
is the first line of defense,
335
00:14:03,107 --> 00:14:05,268
Say, do either of you
ladies like Cable?
336
00:14:05,300 --> 00:14:07,063
Dale!
Dale, I've got to talk to you,
337
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:08,660
I'm talking to some ladies,
338
00:14:08,692 --> 00:14:11,484
These aren't ladies,
Dale, they're men,
339
00:14:14,675 --> 00:14:17,069
I was attacked in my room,
340
00:14:17,103 --> 00:14:19,297
Ah!
341
00:14:21,656 --> 00:14:23,949
Dale, Dale, they're gone,
342
00:14:23,984 --> 00:14:25,745
Don't be too sure,
343
00:14:25,780 --> 00:14:27,907
Describe them,
344
00:14:27,939 --> 00:14:30,133
Um,,, flat nose,
345
00:14:30,167 --> 00:14:32,062
bulbous eyes,,,
346
00:14:32,095 --> 00:14:34,322
vortids,
347
00:14:34,356 --> 00:14:36,883
Stinking vortids,
348
00:14:36,915 --> 00:14:39,275
Consider yourself lucky,
349
00:14:39,308 --> 00:14:41,303
Vortids have been known
to mutilate a body
350
00:14:41,337 --> 00:14:43,431
faster than you can
say seti alpha five,
351
00:14:43,464 --> 00:14:46,556
but if our government
taught them one thing,
352
00:14:46,588 --> 00:14:48,551
it's how to get in
and out quickly,
353
00:14:48,583 --> 00:14:50,113
In other words,
354
00:14:50,146 --> 00:14:51,774
sometimes in their hurry,
355
00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:53,936
they leave a little
something behind,
356
00:14:53,968 --> 00:14:55,631
It may be nothing more
357
00:14:55,664 --> 00:14:59,621
than a Flake of skin or a
bead of gooey-Green sweat,
358
00:14:59,653 --> 00:15:01,482
Dale,
there's nothing under there,
359
00:15:04,474 --> 00:15:07,100
But what about this?
360
00:15:07,132 --> 00:15:09,959
Oh, what is it?
361
00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:12,318
I think you wounded one
during the struggle,
362
00:15:12,353 --> 00:15:13,682
Could be a hunk of skin tissue,
363
00:15:13,715 --> 00:15:15,876
some kind of blood,
maybe even,,,
364
00:15:18,535 --> 00:15:19,997
hair gel,
365
00:15:22,568 --> 00:15:24,297
Admit it, Gunther,
366
00:15:24,330 --> 00:15:25,826
You and your
digit-Worshipping friends
367
00:15:25,859 --> 00:15:27,454
attacked me in my room,
368
00:15:27,488 --> 00:15:29,815
Digit worshipping?
Ooh, that hurt,
369
00:15:29,848 --> 00:15:32,242
These are serious
charges, Gunther,
370
00:15:32,275 --> 00:15:35,400
If you and the Fifth
Column were involved,,,
371
00:15:35,433 --> 00:15:36,938
why the hell would I
even waste my time?
372
00:15:36,962 --> 00:15:39,456
To Make boo look foolish maybe?
373
00:15:39,489 --> 00:15:40,852
She doesn't need any of my help,
374
00:15:40,885 --> 00:15:42,182
She's foolish enough already...
375
00:15:42,215 --> 00:15:44,341
Not to mention gullible
and simple-Minded,
376
00:15:44,375 --> 00:15:46,071
Fess up, Gunther,
377
00:15:46,104 --> 00:15:48,165
You left your calling card,
378
00:15:48,198 --> 00:15:50,260
All right, all right,
379
00:15:50,293 --> 00:15:51,556
Fine!
380
00:15:51,590 --> 00:15:53,418
Fine,
381
00:15:53,451 --> 00:15:54,615
It was us,
382
00:15:56,044 --> 00:15:58,005
We were just trying
to make a point,
383
00:15:58,038 --> 00:15:59,434
If she's stupid
enough to believe
384
00:15:59,468 --> 00:16:00,607
a bunch of cheesy-Looking aliens
385
00:16:00,631 --> 00:16:02,194
could attack her,
386
00:16:02,227 --> 00:16:03,832
who knows what else she
could buy into, huh?
387
00:16:03,856 --> 00:16:05,252
Like, say,
388
00:16:05,285 --> 00:16:06,814
a floating metal fragment,
389
00:16:06,847 --> 00:16:08,343
Good example,
390
00:16:08,376 --> 00:16:11,502
The girl's a Flake,
just like the rest of you,
391
00:16:11,535 --> 00:16:14,261
Hell, this was supposed to be my
year, damn it...
392
00:16:14,294 --> 00:16:18,050
The Fifth Column's year,
393
00:16:18,083 --> 00:16:21,674
Why couldn't you
believe in this?
394
00:16:21,707 --> 00:16:24,400
Bingo,
395
00:16:24,433 --> 00:16:26,328
Smoking gun and all,
396
00:16:26,361 --> 00:16:28,256
Look what we found in
Mr, Monty's dumpster,
397
00:16:28,290 --> 00:16:30,151
Got that hair
squidge all over it,
398
00:16:30,184 --> 00:16:32,212
Polk's rounding
up the last of it,
399
00:16:32,245 --> 00:16:34,107
I have never been so disgusted
400
00:16:34,140 --> 00:16:35,935
in All my,,,
401
00:16:35,968 --> 00:16:38,296
Gunther, pack your bags,
402
00:16:38,329 --> 00:16:39,692
As president
403
00:16:39,725 --> 00:16:41,354
of the north American
ufo convention,
404
00:16:41,387 --> 00:16:45,076
I hereby suspend you and
the rest of the Fifth Column
405
00:16:45,110 --> 00:16:47,935
from any further participation
in naufoc events,
406
00:16:47,968 --> 00:16:49,631
Incoming!
407
00:16:52,324 --> 00:16:54,053
Screw you and your convention,
408
00:16:54,086 --> 00:16:56,213
You can't deny us our
right to be heard,
409
00:16:56,246 --> 00:16:59,470
Go ahead and try,
410
00:16:59,504 --> 00:17:01,831
The finger will not be silenced,
411
00:17:13,133 --> 00:17:14,662
that Gunther...
412
00:17:14,696 --> 00:17:16,591
I'd always thought he'd
go too far some day,
413
00:17:16,624 --> 00:17:17,987
Sure you're okay, boo?
414
00:17:18,021 --> 00:17:19,017
I'm good,
415
00:17:19,050 --> 00:17:20,614
In fact, I'm better than good,
416
00:17:20,647 --> 00:17:22,575
because with Gunther
out of the way,
417
00:17:22,608 --> 00:17:23,738
this press conference
418
00:17:23,771 --> 00:17:25,234
is really going to soar
419
00:17:25,267 --> 00:17:27,129
on the wings of an eagle,
420
00:17:27,162 --> 00:17:28,558
When you say hanging there,,,
421
00:17:28,591 --> 00:17:29,722
we will say,
422
00:17:29,755 --> 00:17:31,051
"There are things
in the universe
423
00:17:31,085 --> 00:17:32,282
"That we don't understand,
424
00:17:32,315 --> 00:17:34,209
things the government
is afraid to share,,,"
425
00:17:34,243 --> 00:17:35,738
boo,,,
426
00:17:35,772 --> 00:17:37,601
"But we have
discovered something
427
00:17:37,634 --> 00:17:39,362
"That will change all of that,
428
00:17:39,396 --> 00:17:41,889
"something that we're
willing to share with you,
429
00:17:41,922 --> 00:17:44,847
Call it what you want,
but we call it the truth,"
430
00:17:44,881 --> 00:17:46,410
Boo!
431
00:17:47,507 --> 00:17:48,837
We've got a problem,
432
00:17:51,530 --> 00:17:53,125
What is it?
433
00:17:53,158 --> 00:17:54,887
Duct tape, some wires,
434
00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:56,449
conductive tubing,,,
435
00:17:56,482 --> 00:17:58,942
tell it again from
the beginning,
436
00:17:58,976 --> 00:18:00,538
Like I said,
437
00:18:00,571 --> 00:18:03,530
the busboy was poking around
at the air vent with a Broom,
438
00:18:03,563 --> 00:18:05,890
and Ping, it opened,
and all this stuff fell out,
439
00:18:05,923 --> 00:18:08,349
Of course,
440
00:18:08,383 --> 00:18:09,955
What do you mean "Of course"?
of course what?
441
00:18:09,979 --> 00:18:11,475
What are you talking about?
442
00:18:11,508 --> 00:18:14,733
Mirrors and wires and
Gerry-Rigged remote control,
443
00:18:14,766 --> 00:18:17,259
Probably holograms, too,
and animatronic sock puppets,
444
00:18:17,292 --> 00:18:18,888
That floating fragment
445
00:18:18,921 --> 00:18:21,481
was nothing but a
piece of theater,
446
00:18:21,514 --> 00:18:25,370
And we fell for it,
hook, line, and sinker,
447
00:18:25,404 --> 00:18:27,474
People, for all you know,
it could be Gunther's handiwork,
448
00:18:27,498 --> 00:18:28,970
or maybe it's been
up there for years,
449
00:18:28,994 --> 00:18:31,055
I bet my bippy,
450
00:18:31,088 --> 00:18:33,548
if you stick a few
magnets in this
451
00:18:33,581 --> 00:18:35,210
and tape it to the ceiling...
452
00:18:35,243 --> 00:18:36,873
Fine, Where are the magnets?
453
00:18:36,906 --> 00:18:38,269
Mr, Buford pulled
a fast one on us,
454
00:18:39,465 --> 00:18:41,858
It's alien autopsy
all over again,
455
00:18:41,892 --> 00:18:43,387
We are so stupid,
456
00:18:43,421 --> 00:18:45,482
But why? Why would he do this?
457
00:18:45,515 --> 00:18:46,987
Maybe we're just
jumping to conclusions,
458
00:18:47,011 --> 00:18:48,042
She's right,
459
00:18:48,075 --> 00:18:49,771
For all we know,
460
00:18:49,804 --> 00:18:52,231
the government put
Buford up to this,
461
00:18:52,264 --> 00:18:53,526
Right, The government,
462
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:54,790
To make us look bad,
463
00:18:54,823 --> 00:18:56,486
Come on, everybody,
464
00:18:56,519 --> 00:18:59,843
sometimes, a piece of tubing
is just a piece of tubing,
465
00:19:01,339 --> 00:19:06,026
I looked into Mr, Buford's eyes,
and he was telling us the truth,
466
00:19:06,059 --> 00:19:07,788
Mr, Buford?
467
00:19:07,822 --> 00:19:09,517
It's only us,
468
00:19:09,550 --> 00:19:11,312
We just want to talk,
469
00:19:11,345 --> 00:19:13,040
Really, uma,
this is so unnecessary,
470
00:19:13,073 --> 00:19:16,198
Then why isn't he
answering the door?
471
00:19:16,232 --> 00:19:17,828
Got it,
472
00:19:17,861 --> 00:19:20,786
Mr, Buford,
sorry to Barge in like this,,,
473
00:19:24,077 --> 00:19:26,038
I think Max is gone,
474
00:19:26,071 --> 00:19:27,767
Telling us the truth,,,
475
00:19:33,019 --> 00:19:37,373
yup, Just like we thought,
476
00:19:37,408 --> 00:19:40,399
Mr, Buford's gone
and So is his box,
477
00:19:40,433 --> 00:19:43,590
Not to mention everything
in the mini-Bar,
478
00:19:43,624 --> 00:19:45,751
Damned hotel better not
try charging us for it,
479
00:19:45,784 --> 00:19:47,713
Hey, some towels are missing,
480
00:19:47,746 --> 00:19:49,507
and so's the rubber bath mat,
481
00:19:49,541 --> 00:19:51,003
What a weirdo,
482
00:19:51,037 --> 00:19:52,765
Nobody up front saw him go,
483
00:19:52,798 --> 00:19:54,694
but we scoured the
parking Lot for his car,
484
00:19:54,727 --> 00:19:57,154
and it definitely isn't there,
485
00:19:57,187 --> 00:19:59,248
How could he just
leave us like that,
486
00:19:59,281 --> 00:20:00,577
without saying anything?
487
00:20:00,611 --> 00:20:03,470
Maybe there's a perfectly
logical explanation,
488
00:20:03,503 --> 00:20:06,494
Yeah, Like maybe he knew
the feds were closing in,
489
00:20:06,528 --> 00:20:08,622
The government didn't
know he was here,
490
00:20:08,656 --> 00:20:10,750
What if the government
did know he was here,
491
00:20:10,783 --> 00:20:13,044
because somebody
told them about it?
492
00:20:16,268 --> 00:20:18,695
You mean, like Gunther,
493
00:20:18,728 --> 00:20:19,759
Yeah, Gunther,
494
00:20:20,689 --> 00:20:22,052
He had a motive,
495
00:20:22,085 --> 00:20:24,778
Could be Gunther,
could be somebody else,
496
00:20:24,811 --> 00:20:27,172
Yeah,,,like,,,
497
00:20:29,865 --> 00:20:31,095
like,,,
498
00:20:31,128 --> 00:20:32,224
like nobody,
499
00:20:32,257 --> 00:20:33,687
The man bolted
500
00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:36,446
because this whole
thing's a lie,
501
00:20:36,479 --> 00:20:39,006
Maybe we were wrong about
Mr, Buford,
502
00:20:39,039 --> 00:20:42,530
Maybe we're wrong
about a lot of things,
503
00:20:44,059 --> 00:20:45,621
Boo?
504
00:20:45,655 --> 00:20:47,483
Boo, where are you going?
505
00:20:50,808 --> 00:20:52,503
Thought I'd find you here,
506
00:20:52,536 --> 00:20:53,999
Have a drink,
507
00:20:54,032 --> 00:20:55,495
Looks like you need one,
508
00:20:55,528 --> 00:20:57,157
Sex on the beach,
509
00:20:57,190 --> 00:20:58,852
How'd you know
that was my drink?
510
00:20:58,885 --> 00:21:01,146
You'd be amazed what you
can learn about people
511
00:21:01,179 --> 00:21:02,708
if you do a little surfing,
512
00:21:02,741 --> 00:21:04,835
Do you mind if I, uh, sit down?
513
00:21:07,528 --> 00:21:09,191
You okay?
514
00:21:09,224 --> 00:21:11,949
Oh, yeah, I'm great,,,
515
00:21:11,983 --> 00:21:13,312
considering this feels
516
00:21:13,345 --> 00:21:14,809
like the worst day of my life,
517
00:21:14,842 --> 00:21:16,305
I should have listened to you
518
00:21:16,338 --> 00:21:17,967
when you said how
complicated things are,
519
00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:21,191
You wanted that fragment to
be real in the worst way,
520
00:21:21,224 --> 00:21:23,419
I'd rather not talk about it,
521
00:21:23,452 --> 00:21:25,712
Funny thing is,
I know how you feel,
522
00:21:29,435 --> 00:21:31,463
Boo, can you keep a secret?
523
00:21:31,496 --> 00:21:33,989
Sure,
524
00:21:36,416 --> 00:21:38,543
You know, uh,,,
that story I tell
525
00:21:38,577 --> 00:21:40,372
about when the
aliens, you know,,,
526
00:21:40,406 --> 00:21:41,802
Oh, my god,
527
00:21:41,835 --> 00:21:44,594
Dale, are you saying that
that actually happened?
528
00:21:44,628 --> 00:21:47,719
Huh?
529
00:21:47,752 --> 00:21:48,949
No, no, no,
530
00:21:48,982 --> 00:21:50,976
I mean, it never happened,
531
00:21:51,010 --> 00:21:52,539
I made it up,
532
00:21:52,572 --> 00:21:55,630
You've got to believe me,
533
00:21:55,663 --> 00:21:57,592
I wanted it to happen,
534
00:21:57,625 --> 00:22:01,448
I wanted to see aliens,
535
00:22:01,482 --> 00:22:03,609
I still do,
536
00:22:03,642 --> 00:22:06,036
but just because you want
something to be True,,,
537
00:22:06,069 --> 00:22:09,293
Dale,,,
538
00:22:09,326 --> 00:22:11,654
I understand, really,
539
00:22:11,687 --> 00:22:13,216
I do,
540
00:22:13,249 --> 00:22:18,402
I know there are aliens
out there and all,
541
00:22:18,435 --> 00:22:21,028
God, I know how desperate
that must sound,
542
00:22:21,061 --> 00:22:23,621
I just wanted to be accepted,
543
00:22:23,654 --> 00:22:25,483
you know?
544
00:22:25,516 --> 00:22:28,475
I mean, all the people
here at the convention,,,
545
00:22:30,270 --> 00:22:33,162
they're like my family,
546
00:22:33,195 --> 00:22:35,290
They accepted me when
nobody else would,,,
547
00:22:36,819 --> 00:22:39,777
and it's all based on a lie,
548
00:22:41,140 --> 00:22:42,968
Can you ever forgive me?
549
00:22:45,229 --> 00:22:47,389
Of course I can,
550
00:22:47,423 --> 00:22:50,049
Thank you,
551
00:23:05,939 --> 00:23:07,534
Wow,
552
00:23:08,499 --> 00:23:11,922
You were great, boo,
553
00:23:11,956 --> 00:23:14,183
Now,
I've been with a lot of women,
554
00:23:14,216 --> 00:23:15,911
not that I'm bragging,
555
00:23:15,945 --> 00:23:17,774
but,,,wow,
556
00:23:17,807 --> 00:23:19,635
You are,,,
557
00:23:21,330 --> 00:23:23,025
and that was,,,
558
00:23:24,655 --> 00:23:26,450
wow,
559
00:23:26,483 --> 00:23:29,940
You didn't think it was
wow, did you?
560
00:23:29,973 --> 00:23:31,835
No, it was fine, Dale,
561
00:23:31,869 --> 00:23:33,564
It was just what I needed,
562
00:23:33,597 --> 00:23:34,694
It was?
563
00:23:34,728 --> 00:23:36,722
It was real, It happened,
564
00:23:36,755 --> 00:23:38,384
There's no denying it,
565
00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:42,406
That's one way of looking at
it, I guess,
566
00:23:42,439 --> 00:23:44,601
You and I just had sex,
567
00:23:44,634 --> 00:23:46,728
That's a fact,
568
00:23:46,761 --> 00:23:49,919
It was way better for
you than it was for me,
569
00:23:49,952 --> 00:23:51,482
That's another fact,
570
00:23:51,515 --> 00:23:52,778
Now, wait a minute,
571
00:23:52,811 --> 00:23:54,216
Just because I wouldn't
stick my tongue...
572
00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:55,737
Dale, I'm not passing
judgment, okay?
573
00:23:57,266 --> 00:23:58,895
it's just that
574
00:23:58,928 --> 00:24:01,055
I have never been
more confused or tired
575
00:24:01,088 --> 00:24:03,349
in my whole life,
576
00:24:03,382 --> 00:24:04,480
Hello?
577
00:24:04,513 --> 00:24:05,809
Listen to me carefully...
578
00:24:05,843 --> 00:24:07,571
Mr, Buford?
579
00:24:07,604 --> 00:24:11,128
Try and understand
what I'm saying,
580
00:24:11,161 --> 00:24:14,353
It's all about John, okay? John,
581
00:24:14,386 --> 00:24:16,281
His life is going
down the drain,
582
00:24:16,314 --> 00:24:17,776
Who?
583
00:24:17,810 --> 00:24:19,604
What the hell are
you talking about?
584
00:24:19,638 --> 00:24:21,899
Listen, it's nothing
personal, Mr, Buford,
585
00:24:21,932 --> 00:24:23,693
but you sound like
you've been drinking,
586
00:24:23,727 --> 00:24:25,689
Boo, please,
listen to me carefully,
587
00:24:25,722 --> 00:24:27,184
I'm not trying to turn you on
588
00:24:27,218 --> 00:24:28,581
or turn you off,
589
00:24:28,614 --> 00:24:30,708
I'm,,,I'm venting, okay?
590
00:24:30,741 --> 00:24:32,204
I'm venting,
591
00:24:32,237 --> 00:24:34,042
Actually, Mr, Buford,
I'm in the middle of something,
592
00:24:34,066 --> 00:24:37,058
Dammit, boo,
you've got to listen to me,
593
00:24:37,091 --> 00:24:38,620
Oh, my god,
594
00:24:38,653 --> 00:24:40,581
Boo, you've got to help me,
595
00:24:40,614 --> 00:24:43,240
I'm in a phone Booth
outside Kyle plastics,
596
00:24:43,274 --> 00:24:45,068
you got that? Kyle plastics,
597
00:24:45,103 --> 00:24:47,429
The nerve of that man,
598
00:24:47,462 --> 00:24:49,224
After all that he's done to me,
599
00:24:49,257 --> 00:24:51,086
to call here at this hour,,,
600
00:24:51,119 --> 00:24:52,715
where did Buford say he was?
601
00:24:52,748 --> 00:24:54,642
It doesn't even matter,
602
00:24:54,676 --> 00:24:57,103
He's drunk and he's probably
feeling sorry for himself,
603
00:24:57,136 --> 00:24:59,064
Maybe,
but if I've learned anything
604
00:24:59,097 --> 00:25:01,158
from my experience in
the security field,
605
00:25:01,192 --> 00:25:03,552
it's that nothing
is ever as it seems,
606
00:25:03,585 --> 00:25:06,478
The man called you for a
reason, boo,
607
00:25:06,511 --> 00:25:08,206
We need to find out why,
608
00:25:27,165 --> 00:25:28,961
I could've told you
609
00:25:28,994 --> 00:25:30,988
this was a waste of time,
610
00:25:31,023 --> 00:25:33,017
Mr, Buford?
611
00:25:33,049 --> 00:25:34,445
Mr, Buford, are you here?
612
00:25:34,479 --> 00:25:36,175
Oh, my god, There he is,
613
00:25:48,552 --> 00:25:49,382
Is he,,,
614
00:25:49,416 --> 00:25:52,043
he's dead, all right,
615
00:26:12,319 --> 00:26:13,783
It's sad,
616
00:26:13,815 --> 00:26:15,279
It's so sad,
617
00:26:15,311 --> 00:26:17,107
Something is not right here,
618
00:26:17,141 --> 00:26:19,235
Dale, please,
you saw all the bottles,
619
00:26:19,268 --> 00:26:21,096
He was inebriated,
620
00:26:21,130 --> 00:26:22,759
Obviously, he hit his head,
621
00:26:22,791 --> 00:26:24,263
and he fell down and
he bled to death,
622
00:26:24,287 --> 00:26:25,751
Sure, he seemed
drunk, but was he?
623
00:26:25,783 --> 00:26:29,074
150 ccs of government-Grade
sodium pentathol
624
00:26:29,108 --> 00:26:30,803
would have exactly the
same effect on him,
625
00:26:30,836 --> 00:26:32,565
The government did not do this,
626
00:26:32,599 --> 00:26:34,593
I'm not saying it
was the government,
627
00:26:34,626 --> 00:26:36,821
Could be the Fifth Column,
628
00:26:36,853 --> 00:26:39,214
or the masons,
or the illuminati, maybe,
629
00:26:39,246 --> 00:26:40,710
Where's the damn fragment?
630
00:26:40,742 --> 00:26:42,273
That's what I want to know,
631
00:26:42,306 --> 00:26:46,028
Well, obviously,
the government got it back,
632
00:26:46,062 --> 00:26:47,657
ooh, or maybe it was the aliens,
633
00:26:47,691 --> 00:26:49,486
Except that's not what
this picture says,
634
00:26:49,519 --> 00:26:50,483
Tell you what I think...
635
00:26:50,515 --> 00:26:53,242
Government guys follow him,
636
00:26:53,275 --> 00:26:55,179
think they've found their
prize, discover they're wrong,
637
00:26:55,203 --> 00:26:56,833
get a little carried away
638
00:26:56,866 --> 00:26:58,428
demonstrating their
disappointment,
639
00:26:58,462 --> 00:27:00,922
Or... Have you thought of this?
640
00:27:00,955 --> 00:27:04,246
Maybe it's just what
it seems to be...
641
00:27:04,278 --> 00:27:05,908
Mr, Buford was a lonely drunk
642
00:27:05,941 --> 00:27:07,903
who thought he could
have a few laughs
643
00:27:07,936 --> 00:27:09,930
pulling a fast one on a
bunch of social outcasts,
644
00:27:09,962 --> 00:27:11,757
That's exactly what
they want you to think,
645
00:27:11,792 --> 00:27:13,952
Look, when it comes to ufos,
646
00:27:13,986 --> 00:27:16,146
the government's
agenda never changes...
647
00:27:16,180 --> 00:27:18,673
Discredit, disavow,,,
648
00:27:19,969 --> 00:27:21,465
disinform,
649
00:27:21,499 --> 00:27:25,255
Now, what you see is real,
650
00:27:25,289 --> 00:27:27,315
but it's a little
more complicated,
651
00:27:27,349 --> 00:27:29,245
A spaceship looks
like a spaceship,
652
00:27:29,278 --> 00:27:31,404
hell, it may even be
a damned spaceship,
653
00:27:31,438 --> 00:27:35,062
but it's not really a spaceship,
654
00:27:36,325 --> 00:27:38,253
You ever wonder how
much work it would take
655
00:27:38,285 --> 00:27:40,181
the people who come
up with these plans
656
00:27:40,215 --> 00:27:42,109
to actually come up with them?
657
00:27:43,838 --> 00:27:45,533
That's why the government
658
00:27:45,565 --> 00:27:47,993
has whole agencies
dedicated to this stuff...
659
00:27:48,026 --> 00:27:50,652
Fema, atf, cia,
the trifab commission,
660
00:27:50,686 --> 00:27:52,182
The what?
661
00:27:52,215 --> 00:27:54,142
You haven't heard about
the trifab commission?
662
00:27:54,176 --> 00:27:56,404
Probably better that way,
663
00:27:56,436 --> 00:27:58,598
Oh, yeah, much better that way,
664
00:27:58,630 --> 00:28:00,369
You're sounding like me...
Doubting everything,
665
00:28:00,393 --> 00:28:02,354
Maybe I'm just wising up,
666
00:28:06,775 --> 00:28:10,465
it's all about
John, okay?
667
00:28:10,498 --> 00:28:12,292
It's all about John,
668
00:28:12,327 --> 00:28:13,955
Who the hell is John?
669
00:28:13,988 --> 00:28:16,449
His life is going
down the drain,
670
00:28:17,812 --> 00:28:20,903
His life is going
down the drain,
671
00:28:20,936 --> 00:28:23,197
I'm venting, okay? I'm venting,
672
00:28:26,089 --> 00:28:28,417
I'm venting,,,
673
00:29:13,427 --> 00:29:15,819
that smart son of a bitch,,,
674
00:29:19,644 --> 00:29:21,772
he kept it wrapped
up nice and tight
675
00:29:21,804 --> 00:29:24,296
to keep in the light,
676
00:29:24,330 --> 00:29:26,291
So, I guess it is real,
677
00:29:31,444 --> 00:29:34,037
Maybe,
678
00:29:34,070 --> 00:29:35,301
I still want to believe in it,
679
00:29:35,334 --> 00:29:36,463
but I want to believe
680
00:29:36,498 --> 00:29:38,425
because I know
intrinsically what it is,
681
00:29:38,458 --> 00:29:41,051
Obviously,
it's no ordinary hunk of metal,
682
00:29:41,085 --> 00:29:43,014
Well, yeah,
683
00:29:43,046 --> 00:29:44,342
I mean, it floats,
684
00:29:44,377 --> 00:29:46,271
But do we know why it floats?
685
00:29:46,304 --> 00:29:47,832
No,
686
00:29:47,867 --> 00:29:49,827
Does the fact that it floats
687
00:29:49,861 --> 00:29:51,756
mean that it comes
from outer space,
688
00:29:51,790 --> 00:29:53,850
and that's the only
possible explanation?
689
00:29:53,883 --> 00:29:55,779
I'm not qualified to
say and neither are you,
690
00:29:55,811 --> 00:29:58,671
Still, the fact that
it does what it does,,,
691
00:29:58,703 --> 00:30:00,000
it's got to be
692
00:30:00,034 --> 00:30:01,629
from an alien technology,
693
00:30:01,663 --> 00:30:04,256
Or maybe it's just a
really clever magic trick,
694
00:30:04,288 --> 00:30:06,449
and we haven't figured
out how they're doing it,
695
00:30:06,481 --> 00:30:09,142
If you want to
drive yourself crazy
696
00:30:09,174 --> 00:30:11,069
thinking up all these what-Ifs,
697
00:30:11,103 --> 00:30:12,799
go right ahead,
698
00:30:12,832 --> 00:30:14,627
Personally, I think it's time
699
00:30:14,659 --> 00:30:18,184
to look what truth I do
know squarely in the face,
700
00:30:18,218 --> 00:30:21,276
You want to know why
I believe in aliens?
701
00:30:23,136 --> 00:30:25,130
I believe in aliens
because I needed to,
702
00:30:29,054 --> 00:30:32,379
When I was in college,
I met this guy, Winton,
703
00:30:32,411 --> 00:30:33,775
and we had a little daughter
704
00:30:33,808 --> 00:30:35,003
named Krishna,
705
00:30:35,038 --> 00:30:36,734
One day,
706
00:30:36,767 --> 00:30:39,626
we're all heading to
this ashram in oregon,
707
00:30:39,659 --> 00:30:40,623
It was Winton's idea,
708
00:30:40,656 --> 00:30:42,184
He was always very spiritual,
709
00:30:42,219 --> 00:30:45,045
We stopped at this little cafe
710
00:30:45,077 --> 00:30:46,149
out in the middle of nowhere
711
00:30:46,173 --> 00:30:47,437
so I could go use the bathroom,
712
00:30:47,470 --> 00:30:51,726
and when I came
out, they were gone,
713
00:30:51,758 --> 00:30:54,518
They just drove off without you?
714
00:30:54,550 --> 00:30:56,679
They never showed
up at the ashram,
715
00:30:56,713 --> 00:30:59,038
and they never went back
to our little apartment,
716
00:30:59,072 --> 00:31:00,369
and when I called
Winton's family
717
00:31:00,402 --> 00:31:01,408
to find out what had happened,
718
00:31:01,432 --> 00:31:02,497
they said no,
719
00:31:02,529 --> 00:31:03,860
I mean, as far as they knew,
720
00:31:03,893 --> 00:31:05,919
Winton and Krishna
had just vanished,
721
00:31:05,954 --> 00:31:08,413
Maybe they weren't
telling the truth,
722
00:31:08,447 --> 00:31:11,738
Well, I'm sure they weren't,
723
00:31:11,771 --> 00:31:13,599
I guess I got
really carried away,
724
00:31:13,633 --> 00:31:17,422
because the next thing I know,
I'm locked up in this hospital,
725
00:31:17,455 --> 00:31:19,251
and I'm looking out the
window, day after day,
726
00:31:19,283 --> 00:31:22,708
thinking to myself,
"Where'd they go?
727
00:31:22,741 --> 00:31:24,536
Where'd they go?"
728
00:31:24,569 --> 00:31:28,426
and then, one day,
another patient wanders by,
729
00:31:28,458 --> 00:31:30,421
and says,
"maybe the aliens took them,"
730
00:31:30,453 --> 00:31:34,809
and I thought to myself,
"Well, why the hell not?"
731
00:31:34,841 --> 00:31:37,900
I mean, I could live with that,
732
00:31:37,932 --> 00:31:39,396
Funny thing is
733
00:31:39,428 --> 00:31:41,257
that's when I started
to feel better,
734
00:31:41,291 --> 00:31:44,848
Sounds like his family
talked him into leaving you,
735
00:31:44,881 --> 00:31:48,803
and taking the baby with him,
736
00:31:48,837 --> 00:31:51,396
I guess I need to look in to
that, huh?
737
00:31:56,217 --> 00:31:59,209
So, what do we do about This?
738
00:32:01,536 --> 00:32:03,298
We tell the truth,
739
00:32:03,331 --> 00:32:05,558
What is with all the
mystery, Ike?
740
00:32:05,592 --> 00:32:06,922
We really need
741
00:32:06,954 --> 00:32:08,617
to get down to the
convention floor,
742
00:32:08,649 --> 00:32:10,244
I've got a Booth to
finish setting up,
743
00:32:10,279 --> 00:32:11,242
Look, everyone,
744
00:32:11,276 --> 00:32:12,573
I know This is inconvenient,
745
00:32:12,606 --> 00:32:14,533
but I promise it's important,
746
00:32:14,567 --> 00:32:16,295
Oh, boo, come on in,
747
00:32:16,328 --> 00:32:17,293
Okay, you all remember
748
00:32:17,325 --> 00:32:18,689
how we searched
749
00:32:18,721 --> 00:32:20,217
Mr, Buford's hotel
room yesterday?
750
00:32:20,251 --> 00:32:23,109
Well, we missed something,
751
00:32:23,144 --> 00:32:25,304
You found the fragment?
752
00:32:25,338 --> 00:32:26,368
Well done, boo,
753
00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:27,531
I knew it would turn up,
754
00:32:27,565 --> 00:32:30,489
I thought we all
agreed it was fake,
755
00:32:30,523 --> 00:32:32,883
Funny, I don't remember
anyone agreeing to anything,
756
00:32:39,764 --> 00:32:42,325
Why don't you, uh,
check the ceiling tiles?
757
00:32:42,357 --> 00:32:44,685
Go ahead and rip up the
carpet, if you like,
758
00:32:46,180 --> 00:32:48,341
My god!
759
00:32:48,375 --> 00:32:49,837
I told you it wasn't fake,
760
00:32:49,871 --> 00:32:51,233
No, I told you,
761
00:32:51,267 --> 00:32:52,340
What are we sitting here for?
762
00:32:52,364 --> 00:32:54,093
Let's take it downstairs,
763
00:32:54,125 --> 00:32:55,122
No, no, no, no,
764
00:32:55,157 --> 00:32:55,987
Everybody,
hang on just a second,
765
00:32:56,019 --> 00:32:58,647
Wait a minute, okay?
766
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:02,203
Now, we have to be very
careful about this,
767
00:33:03,966 --> 00:33:06,192
Ike says he wants us to
be taken more seriously,
768
00:33:06,227 --> 00:33:07,656
and that's what has to happen,
769
00:33:07,688 --> 00:33:10,149
You don't think they'll
take this seriously?
770
00:33:10,181 --> 00:33:12,542
Are any of you a metallurgist?
771
00:33:12,574 --> 00:33:14,038
Maybe a physicist?
772
00:33:14,070 --> 00:33:15,367
How about
773
00:33:15,401 --> 00:33:16,930
your plain old scientist?
774
00:33:16,962 --> 00:33:18,625
I didn't think so,
775
00:33:18,658 --> 00:33:20,153
Which means,
776
00:33:20,188 --> 00:33:21,649
that as interesting
as this thing is,
777
00:33:21,684 --> 00:33:23,911
we don't know what it is,
778
00:33:23,943 --> 00:33:25,507
therefore,
779
00:33:25,539 --> 00:33:28,630
we are going to present this
to the world as a mystery,
780
00:33:28,665 --> 00:33:31,191
and we are going to
invite the world...
781
00:33:31,223 --> 00:33:32,520
The government included...
782
00:33:32,554 --> 00:33:34,882
To help us solve that mystery,
783
00:33:34,914 --> 00:33:36,278
The government?
784
00:33:36,310 --> 00:33:37,873
Don't you see?
785
00:33:37,905 --> 00:33:40,732
This is a part of our problem,
786
00:33:40,765 --> 00:33:42,029
We don't trust anybody,
787
00:33:42,062 --> 00:33:43,391
not even ourselves,
788
00:33:43,425 --> 00:33:46,251
which is why I'm hoping
that by reaching out,
789
00:33:46,283 --> 00:33:48,943
in the spirit of cooperation,
790
00:33:48,975 --> 00:33:50,372
that we can end
791
00:33:50,406 --> 00:33:52,565
the mistrust and the paranoia,
792
00:33:54,694 --> 00:33:55,891
Ike,,,
793
00:33:55,924 --> 00:33:57,851
you,,,
794
00:33:57,885 --> 00:33:58,849
you want me to do it?
795
00:33:58,883 --> 00:34:00,910
You're our Leader,
796
00:34:00,942 --> 00:34:02,215
I think the world
should hear about this
797
00:34:02,239 --> 00:34:03,902
from one voice...
798
00:34:03,934 --> 00:34:04,932
Yours,
799
00:34:07,525 --> 00:34:08,921
Thank you, boo,
800
00:34:08,955 --> 00:34:10,883
I appreciate this,
801
00:34:12,944 --> 00:34:15,372
Is there anyone here
who disagrees with This?
802
00:34:24,014 --> 00:34:25,010
Good,
803
00:34:25,044 --> 00:34:27,005
Let's go tell the world,
804
00:34:35,980 --> 00:34:37,343
Where the hell is Everyone?
805
00:34:37,377 --> 00:34:38,584
Didn't you just pass
them in the hall?
806
00:34:38,608 --> 00:34:39,846
They're heading down to
the convention floor,
807
00:34:39,870 --> 00:34:41,067
No!
808
00:34:41,101 --> 00:34:42,098
Who's got the suitcase?
809
00:34:42,130 --> 00:34:42,961
Ike does,
810
00:34:42,996 --> 00:34:44,059
We've got to stop him,
811
00:34:44,093 --> 00:34:45,621
Dale, don't get me started,
812
00:34:45,654 --> 00:34:47,425
I just saw Gunther Van
Owen in the parking lot,
813
00:34:47,449 --> 00:34:48,955
I don't think he's here
for the refreshments,
814
00:34:48,979 --> 00:34:50,408
What are you talking about?
815
00:34:50,441 --> 00:34:52,835
Remember when I said I was
looking into some people?
816
00:34:52,869 --> 00:34:55,163
Well,
say hello to Ike pilchard...
817
00:34:55,195 --> 00:34:57,090
Gunther Van Owen's best Buddy
818
00:34:57,123 --> 00:34:57,856
and card-Carrying member
819
00:34:57,888 --> 00:34:58,685
of the Fifth Column
820
00:34:58,718 --> 00:35:00,913
and the f-B-Freakin'-I,
821
00:35:04,038 --> 00:35:06,996
You've got to listen to me
before you go down there,
822
00:35:07,030 --> 00:35:09,025
Do you recognize the guy
in the potato-Sack race?
823
00:35:09,058 --> 00:35:11,450
Ike at a fifth-Column
picnic 10 years ago,
824
00:35:11,484 --> 00:35:13,844
I got this off the
fifth-Column web site,
825
00:35:13,877 --> 00:35:15,672
Here's another shocker...
826
00:35:15,706 --> 00:35:18,664
Gunther Van Owen,
827
00:35:18,698 --> 00:35:19,995
He's a shriner,
828
00:35:20,027 --> 00:35:21,024
So?
829
00:35:23,486 --> 00:35:24,016
It's basic...
830
00:35:24,049 --> 00:35:25,945
Basic!
831
00:35:25,979 --> 00:35:27,507
Shriners are masons,
832
00:35:27,540 --> 00:35:30,267
Masons have ties to the
U, S, Government,
833
00:35:30,300 --> 00:35:31,963
which have gone all the way back
834
00:35:31,995 --> 00:35:34,355
to the beginnings
of the republic,
835
00:35:34,388 --> 00:35:36,482
To reach the highest
level of masondom...
836
00:35:36,516 --> 00:35:38,544
The 33rd level...
837
00:35:38,576 --> 00:35:41,402
Masons from all over the world
838
00:35:41,436 --> 00:35:44,461
have to travel to
Washington, D, C,
839
00:35:45,657 --> 00:35:48,250
The connections are obvious,
840
00:35:48,283 --> 00:35:50,644
The Fifth Column and the
FBI are one and the same!
841
00:35:50,677 --> 00:35:53,005
Dale,
that is the flimsiest story...
842
00:35:53,038 --> 00:35:54,234
All right, all right,
843
00:35:54,268 --> 00:35:55,730
What about this one, then?
844
00:35:55,764 --> 00:35:57,924
This is from the
telephone directory
845
00:35:57,957 --> 00:36:00,251
of the j, Edgar Hoover
building in Washington, D, C,
846
00:36:00,285 --> 00:36:02,212
What's Gunther's
name doing on there
847
00:36:02,245 --> 00:36:03,708
if he isn't a fed?
848
00:36:03,741 --> 00:36:05,303
Oh, my god,
849
00:36:05,337 --> 00:36:07,466
Gunther Van Owen,
right there on the page,
850
00:36:07,498 --> 00:36:08,628
Disavow, discredit,,,
851
00:36:08,663 --> 00:36:09,792
disinform, Exactly,
852
00:36:09,825 --> 00:36:11,786
Doesn't that sound
like Gunther to you?
853
00:36:11,819 --> 00:36:14,878
It sounds like the
whole damned government,
854
00:36:14,911 --> 00:36:16,806
So Ike and Gunther,,,
855
00:36:16,841 --> 00:36:18,202
are plants,
856
00:36:18,237 --> 00:36:19,898
It's hide in Plain
sight times two,
857
00:36:19,932 --> 00:36:22,425
And I have just put the
fragment into their hands,
858
00:36:22,458 --> 00:36:24,585
How much do you want to bet
859
00:36:24,619 --> 00:36:27,312
that those bastards have
already switched that fragment
860
00:36:27,344 --> 00:36:29,007
for some cheap plastic doo-Dad,
861
00:36:29,039 --> 00:36:30,236
so that when Ike gets up there
862
00:36:30,269 --> 00:36:31,899
and reveals it to the world...
863
00:36:31,931 --> 00:36:33,371
Everyone's going to
think we're lying,
864
00:36:33,395 --> 00:36:34,691
They'll think we're all crazy,
865
00:36:34,723 --> 00:36:36,652
We've got to stop him,
866
00:37:06,306 --> 00:37:08,166
Okay, everyone, sit down,,,
867
00:37:08,200 --> 00:37:11,025
I surrender!
868
00:37:24,455 --> 00:37:26,052
Good morning, everyone,
869
00:37:26,084 --> 00:37:27,647
I'd like to welcome you all
870
00:37:27,680 --> 00:37:30,406
to the 10th annual north
American ufo convention,
871
00:37:37,553 --> 00:37:39,515
I think you'll find
this year's gathering
872
00:37:39,547 --> 00:37:41,675
is, well, to put it
mildly, kind of special,
873
00:37:41,709 --> 00:37:43,237
and I'm happy to see
874
00:37:43,270 --> 00:37:46,528
our friends in the media
have shown up, too,
875
00:37:46,561 --> 00:37:49,354
I promise you,
you will not be disappointed,
876
00:37:49,388 --> 00:37:51,349
Our story begins
877
00:37:51,383 --> 00:37:54,275
at Mr,
Monty's house of fondue,,,
878
00:37:54,307 --> 00:37:55,380
the whole Fifth Column's here,
879
00:37:55,403 --> 00:37:56,767
I can feel it,
880
00:37:56,800 --> 00:37:59,127
and the cia, the fbi,
the trifab commission,
881
00:38:01,121 --> 00:38:03,848
There, There, Do you see him?
882
00:38:03,880 --> 00:38:05,676
Is that a person?
883
00:38:05,709 --> 00:38:07,305
It's Gunther,
884
00:38:07,339 --> 00:38:09,664
What's he doing up there?
885
00:38:09,699 --> 00:38:11,528
If I know anything about
how the feds operate,
886
00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:13,024
he's their insurance policy,
887
00:38:13,056 --> 00:38:14,386
Come on, Hurry,
888
00:38:14,420 --> 00:38:16,347
So, to be honest,
we're not exactly sure
889
00:38:16,380 --> 00:38:18,010
how poor Mr, Buford
890
00:38:18,042 --> 00:38:19,738
Came to his untimely
demise last night,
891
00:38:19,771 --> 00:38:22,198
All we do know is
that he showed up,
892
00:38:22,230 --> 00:38:25,490
gave us the spaceship fragment
that's in this suitcase,
893
00:38:25,522 --> 00:38:27,982
then ran,
894
00:38:28,014 --> 00:38:31,937
Now, those of us who
attend these conferences,
895
00:38:31,972 --> 00:38:33,533
we hear a lot of stories,
896
00:38:33,567 --> 00:38:36,859
and some of them are
pretty fantastical,
897
00:38:36,891 --> 00:38:38,654
which is all a
convoluted way of saying
898
00:38:38,686 --> 00:38:41,212
that what I'm about
to show you is,,,
899
00:38:41,247 --> 00:38:42,842
well,,,
900
00:38:42,874 --> 00:38:45,336
I guess I'll let it
speak for itself,
901
00:38:45,368 --> 00:38:47,262
No, sir, Ike,
Not today, you don't,
902
00:38:47,296 --> 00:38:48,527
What are you doing?
903
00:38:48,559 --> 00:38:49,756
We know about you and Gunther,
904
00:38:50,986 --> 00:38:53,345
You fifth-Column lover,
905
00:38:53,379 --> 00:38:55,540
Boo, what are you talking about?
906
00:38:56,406 --> 00:38:58,565
Ladies and gentlemen,
I must apologize,
907
00:38:58,599 --> 00:39:00,725
Those us at naufoc
are well aware
908
00:39:00,759 --> 00:39:02,289
that Mr, Larose
909
00:39:02,322 --> 00:39:03,495
is somewhat prone to hyperbole,
910
00:39:03,519 --> 00:39:06,478
Don't listen to him, folks,
911
00:39:06,510 --> 00:39:08,173
Ike's the definition of a liar,
912
00:39:08,205 --> 00:39:10,167
He doesn't want you to
know he's an agent...
913
00:39:10,200 --> 00:39:11,695
Of the federal government...
914
00:39:11,729 --> 00:39:14,821
Who has been trying to
attain this metal fragment
915
00:39:14,855 --> 00:39:16,483
since we got it last night,
916
00:39:16,516 --> 00:39:18,610
Ladies and gentlemen,
I implore you,,,
917
00:39:21,669 --> 00:39:24,960
he wanted us to open this
and show you what was inside,
918
00:39:24,993 --> 00:39:26,954
He knew that you would
think that We are liars,
919
00:39:26,987 --> 00:39:28,550
and we're crazy,
920
00:39:28,583 --> 00:39:30,545
because there's nothing in here,
921
00:39:30,578 --> 00:39:33,106
Aliens are real,
922
00:39:33,138 --> 00:39:34,302
They're here,
923
00:39:34,334 --> 00:39:35,698
They're among us,
924
00:39:35,730 --> 00:39:37,136
and they're working
with our government,
925
00:39:37,159 --> 00:39:39,089
Our government is lying to us,
926
00:39:39,121 --> 00:39:40,551
and the proof,,,
927
00:39:42,979 --> 00:39:45,437
Dale! Dale!
928
00:39:52,318 --> 00:39:53,948
Believe,
929
00:40:02,425 --> 00:40:04,286
It looks like four
shots have been fired
930
00:40:04,321 --> 00:40:06,546
here at the north
American ufo convention,
931
00:40:06,579 --> 00:40:08,475
more and more shots
now ringing out,
932
00:40:08,509 --> 00:40:11,034
It's just pandemonium here,
933
00:40:11,068 --> 00:40:13,228
Dale was telling the truth,
934
00:40:13,261 --> 00:40:14,469
That's why the
government killed him,
935
00:40:14,493 --> 00:40:15,821
You've got to listen to me,
936
00:40:15,855 --> 00:40:18,315
Disavow, discredit, disinform...
937
00:40:18,348 --> 00:40:20,242
That's what they're
trying to do to us,
938
00:40:20,277 --> 00:40:22,137
We're just getting word now
939
00:40:22,171 --> 00:40:24,996
that the police have
surrounded the shooter,
940
00:40:25,029 --> 00:40:28,255
Don't move, asshole,
Don't move a muscle!
941
00:40:34,139 --> 00:40:35,535
Our source is telling us now
942
00:40:35,568 --> 00:40:37,538
that the police have a tentative
I, D, On the shooter,
943
00:40:37,562 --> 00:40:40,821
Apparently,
he belongs to a splinter group
944
00:40:40,853 --> 00:40:42,881
which is at odds with
the convention leadership
945
00:40:42,915 --> 00:40:45,075
over some kind of alien finger,
946
00:40:45,109 --> 00:40:46,770
His name is Gunther Van Owen...
947
00:40:46,805 --> 00:40:48,366
That is not the truth!
948
00:40:48,400 --> 00:40:49,805
Gunther Van Owen works
for the government,
949
00:40:49,829 --> 00:40:51,258
Gunther Van Owen
is the government,
950
00:40:51,292 --> 00:40:54,250
Ladies and gentlemen,
it's a very, very sad day here,
951
00:40:54,284 --> 00:40:56,279
The question isn't
really, do aliens Exist?
952
00:40:56,311 --> 00:40:58,405
We'll probably never
know the answer to that,
953
00:40:58,438 --> 00:40:59,901
The real issue here
954
00:40:59,934 --> 00:41:02,328
is what would make one
of these people so angry,
955
00:41:02,362 --> 00:41:04,856
what would cause them
to become so unhinged
956
00:41:04,888 --> 00:41:08,079
that they would perpetrate
an act of violence like this?
957
00:41:12,068 --> 00:41:13,931
A toaster?
958
00:41:16,190 --> 00:41:18,617
Dale was right,
959
00:41:37,168 --> 00:41:38,763
I think we did it,
960
00:41:38,795 --> 00:41:40,259
How is he?
961
00:41:41,887 --> 00:41:45,345
He is fine,,,
962
00:41:45,377 --> 00:41:48,169
but he'd be a whole lot better
if that so-Called marksman
963
00:41:48,202 --> 00:41:52,059
hit the Vest where
he was supposed to,
964
00:41:52,092 --> 00:41:56,248
When we get back to the office,
I would like a word with him,
965
00:41:56,281 --> 00:41:58,874
And the package? Can I see it?
966
00:42:00,270 --> 00:42:01,766
Right here,
967
00:42:04,758 --> 00:42:06,220
Good job,
968
00:42:06,254 --> 00:42:07,849
Think the folks back there
969
00:42:07,883 --> 00:42:09,711
will buy the goods
we just sold them?
970
00:42:09,745 --> 00:42:12,703
If you mean will anyone know
the trifab commission did this,
971
00:42:12,736 --> 00:42:14,531
I doubt it,
972
00:42:14,565 --> 00:42:18,055
Those poor,
crazy bastards back there...
973
00:42:18,088 --> 00:42:21,213
No one'll ever believe a
word they say ever again,
974
00:42:25,501 --> 00:42:27,662
Even when they're right,
975
00:42:29,357 --> 00:42:34,543
I believe, I believe,
I believe, I believe,,,
976
00:42:34,576 --> 00:42:38,466
I believe, I believe,
I believe, I believe,,,
977
00:42:38,500 --> 00:42:43,053
sometimes,
the best way to hide the truth